From: WindSparrow@webtv.net Newsgroups: rec.arts.books.tolkien Subject: Top 10 List - things to do in Middle Earth Date: Fri, 27 Jul 2001 17:03:41 -0700 (MST) Organization: WebTV Subscriber Lines: 47 Message-ID: <3430-3B62015D-382@storefull-265.iap.bryant.webtv.net> NNTP-Posting-Host: localhost.webtv.net Mime-Version: 1.0 (WebTV) Content-Type: Text/Plain; Charset=US-ASCII Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7Bit X-WebTV-Signature: 1 ETAtAhRlcvcnS9lyUZkOIPZUbJZg2KH38wIVAJAsk3mhhw5aVMh8PnaQoLpb3cmN Content-Disposition: Inline Path: chonsp.franklin.ch!pfaff.ethz.ch!news-zh.switch.ch!news-ge.switch.ch!newsfeed00.sul.t-online.de!t-online.de!nntp-relay.ihug.net!ihug.co.nz!nntp.cs.ubc.ca!newsfeed.stanford.edu!paloalto-snf1.gtei.net!news.gtei.net!webtv.net!not-for-mail Xref: chonsp.franklin.ch rec.arts.books.tolkien:44996 All the recent talk of the relative merit (or de-merit, as the case may be) of getting listed in the Top 10 Posters, gave me an idea.... Windy's List of the Top 10 things to do while vacationing in Middle Earth. 10. Insult the character and parentage of the local fauna, especially the giant arachnids. They enjoy friendly banter like this. Really. 9. Talk to the trees politely. Some of them don't like uppity humans. 8. Ask if they have palantiri in every room when first checking into an inn. 7. Be sure to have a passport made with your hobbit name. They won't let you into the Shire without it. 6. Compliment inn-keepers by saying, "Ah, now that was proper 1420, that was," about the ale. They might not even charge you for it, they'll be so pleased. 5. Four words: Para-sailing on the Sea of Rhun. Ok, so that's six words.... You get the idea. 4. If you find a reasonably hard black rock, pick it up for a souvenir. You can tell your friends back home it is a genuine chip off Orthanc, bought for a song from an ent. Pretend to send it away for laboratory testing in order to determine just what the Numenorians made it out of. 3. Joyriding in Rohan. There's no speed limit there. 2. Take the guided white water rafting trip down the Anduin, and don't forget the optional pirogue tour of the Dead Marshes. And the number One thing to do while vacationing in Middle Earth is... Be loud and obnoxious in Moria, so you can have a chance to see for yourself whether or not balrogs have wings. Windy ------- "I don't want to hear any whining around here, so I'll shut up now." --The Man Song ###### From: Finrod Felagund Newsgroups: rec.arts.books.tolkien Subject: Re: Top 10 List - things to do in Middle Earth Date: Sat, 28 Jul 2001 00:33:48 -0400 Organization: Michigan State University Lines: 47 Message-ID: References: <3430-3B62015D-382@storefull-265.iap.bryant.webtv.net> NNTP-Posting-Host: ac87bb4d.ipt.aol.com Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="US-ASCII" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit X-AUTHid: pavlikad User-Agent: Microsoft-Entourage/9.0.1.3108 Path: chonsp.franklin.ch!pfaff.ethz.ch!news-zh.switch.ch!pinatubo.switch.ch!newsfeeds.belnet.be!news.belnet.be!news.tele.dk!204.94.211.44!enews.sgi.com!harbinger.cc.monash.edu.au!msunews!not-for-mail Xref: chonsp.franklin.ch rec.arts.books.tolkien:45018 On 7/27/01 8:03 PM, in article 3430-3B62015D-382@storefull-265.iap.bryant.webtv.net, "WindSparrow@webtv.net" wrote: > All the recent talk of the relative merit (or de-merit, as the case may > be) of getting listed in the Top 10 Posters, gave me an idea.... > > Windy's List of the Top 10 things to do while vacationing in Middle > Earth. > > 10. Insult the character and parentage of the local fauna, especially > the giant arachnids. They enjoy friendly banter like this. Really. > > 9. Talk to the trees politely. Some of them don't like uppity humans. > > 8. Ask if they have palantiri in every room when first checking into an > inn. > > 7. Be sure to have a passport made with your hobbit name. They won't > let you into the Shire without it. > > 6. Compliment inn-keepers by saying, "Ah, now that was proper 1420, > that was," about the ale. They might not even charge you for it, > they'll be so pleased. > > 5. Four words: Para-sailing on the Sea of Rhun. Ok, so that's six > words.... You get the idea. > > 4. If you find a reasonably hard black rock, pick it up for a souvenir. > You can tell your friends back home it is a genuine chip off Orthanc, > bought for a song from an ent. Pretend to send it away for laboratory > testing in order to determine just what the Numenorians made it out of. > > 3. Joyriding in Rohan. There's no speed limit there. > > 2. Take the guided white water rafting trip down the Anduin, and don't > forget the optional pirogue tour of the Dead Marshes. > > And the number One thing to do while vacationing in Middle Earth is... > > Be loud and obnoxious in Moria, so you can have a chance to see for > yourself whether or not balrogs have wings. This list reminded me of a piece I found fascinating at theonering.net's Green Books section. I believe the writer QuickBeam did a piece on those lands of Tolkien that are never explored first-person. I enjoyed it. ###### From: Menelvagor@mailandnews.com (Count Menelvagor) Newsgroups: rec.arts.books.tolkien Subject: Re: Top 10 List - things to do in Middle Earth Date: 29 Jul 2001 12:16:23 -0700 Organization: http://groups.google.com/ Lines: 23 Message-ID: <6bfb27a8.0107291116.223e7e24@posting.google.com> References: <3430-3B62015D-382@storefull-265.iap.bryant.webtv.net> NNTP-Posting-Host: 136.242.228.144 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=ISO-8859-1 Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit X-Trace: posting.google.com 996434183 29468 127.0.0.1 (29 Jul 2001 19:16:23 GMT) X-Complaints-To: groups-support@google.com NNTP-Posting-Date: 29 Jul 2001 19:16:23 GMT Path: chonsp.franklin.ch!pfaff.ethz.ch!news-zh.switch.ch!pinatubo.switch.ch!newsfeeds.belnet.be!news.belnet.be!newsfeed.stanford.edu!postnews1.google.com!not-for-mail Xref: chonsp.franklin.ch rec.arts.books.tolkien:45234 10.Get into a political flame war with a Hobbiton Whig (a Republican by any other bame). 9.Enjoy the company of the sensuous Elf-"maidens" of Lórien ... 8.Slay a dragon. 7.A romantic trip for two to Belfalas, to wallow in an idyllic solitude with several thousand disgusting beach-slobs. 6.Go ski-ing with Orcs in the Misty Mountains. 5.Destroy the Ring. 4.Fence with the Witchking. 3.Assume the Crown of Gondor and Arnor. 2.Write a diary and have it made into a motion picture. And the number one thing to do in ME: 1.become a pipeweed pusher. ###### From: WindSparrow@webtv.net Newsgroups: rec.arts.books.tolkien Subject: Re: Top 10 List - things to do in Middle Earth Date: Sun, 29 Jul 2001 13:08:56 -0700 (MST) Organization: WebTV Subscriber Lines: 11 Message-ID: <20929-3B646D58-62@storefull-266.iap.bryant.webtv.net> References: <6bfb27a8.0107291116.223e7e24@posting.google.com> NNTP-Posting-Host: localhost.webtv.net Mime-Version: 1.0 (WebTV) Content-Type: Text/Plain; Charset=ISO-8859-1 Content-Transfer-Encoding: Quoted-Printable X-WebTV-Signature: 1 ETAsAhRMe0muBcRNZ1BAhvpin7FYHMRr/AIUGJrVMNWoHK0tJ4qIAqaWS60yHgM= Content-Disposition: Inline Path: chonsp.franklin.ch!pfaff.ethz.ch!news-zh.switch.ch!pinatubo.switch.ch!newsfeeds.belnet.be!news.belnet.be!newsfeed.stanford.edu!news.kjsl.com!news.spies.com!webtv.net!not-for-mail Xref: chonsp.franklin.ch rec.arts.books.tolkien:45196 Menelvagor@mailandnews.com (Count=A0Menelvagor) wrote: >And the number one thing to do in ME: >1.become a pipeweed pusher. ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!! Thank you for joining my little game. Windy