From: hawksmoor@dial.pipex.com (Julia Hawkes-Moore) Newsgroups: alt.out-of-body Subject: NEWSGROUP PERSONALITY Date: Sun, 18 Apr 1999 19:37:46 GMT Organization: UUNET WorldCom server (post doesn't reflect views of UUNET WorldCom Lines: 41 Message-ID: <371a3421.42296808@news.dial.pipex.com> NNTP-Posting-Host: aa210.du.pipex.com X-Trace: lure.pipex.net 924461465 21816 193.130.240.210 (18 Apr 1999 18:51:05 GMT) X-Complaints-To: abuse@uk.uu.net NNTP-Posting-Date: 18 Apr 1999 18:51:05 GMT X-Newsreader: Forte Free Agent 1.1/16.230 Path: chonsp.franklin.ch!pfaff.ethz.ch!news-zh.switch.ch!news-ge.switch.ch!isdnet!uu.fr!eyre.news.pipex.net!pipex!bore.news.pipex.net!pipex!not-for-mail I happened across this, which I just had to share with you! NEWSGROUP PERSONALITY Words: anonymous To be sung to "Modern Major General" by Gilbert & Sullivan I am the very model of a Newsgroup personality. I intersperse obscenity with tedious banality. Addresses I have plenty of, both genuine and ghosted, too, On all the countless newsgroups that my drivel is cross-posted to. Your bandwidth I will fritter with my whining and my snivelling, And you're the one who pays the bill, downloading all my drivelling. My enemies are numerous, and no-one would be blaming you, For cracking my head open after I've been rudely flaming you. I hate to lose an argument (by now I should be used to it). I wouldn't know a valid point if I was introduced to it. My learning is extensive but consists of mindless trivia, Designed to fan my ego, which is larger than Bolivia. The comments that I vomit forth, disguised as jest and drollery, Are really just an exercise in unremitting trollery. I say I'm frank and forthright, but that's merely lies and vanity, The gibberings of one who's at the limits of his sanity. If only I could get a life, as many people tell me to; If only Mom could find a circus freak-show she could sell me to; If I go off to Zanzibar to paint the local scenery; If I lose all my fingers in a mishap with machinery; If I survive to twenty, which is somewhat problematical; If what I post was more mature, or slightly more grammatical; If I could learn to spell a bit, and maybe even punctuate; Would I still be the loathsome and objectionable punk you hate? But while I have this tiresome urge to prance around and show my face, It simply isn't safe for normal people here in cyberspace. To stick me in Old Sparky and turn on the electricity, Would be a fitting punishment for my egocentricity. I always have the last word; so, with uttermost finality, That's all from me, the model of a Newsgroup personality. ~~~~~~~~~ ###### From: hawksmoor@dial.pipex.com (Julia Hawkes-Moore) Newsgroups: alt.out-of-body Subject: Re: NEWSGROUP PERSONALITY Date: Sun, 18 Apr 1999 21:12:14 GMT Organization: UUNET WorldCom server (post doesn't reflect views of UUNET WorldCom Lines: 12 Message-ID: <371a49c9.47834896@news.dial.pipex.com> References: <371a3421.42296808@news.dial.pipex.com> NNTP-Posting-Host: aa156.du.pipex.com X-Trace: lure.pipex.net 924467131 28904 193.130.240.156 (18 Apr 1999 20:25:31 GMT) X-Complaints-To: abuse@uk.uu.net NNTP-Posting-Date: 18 Apr 1999 20:25:31 GMT X-Newsreader: Forte Free Agent 1.1/16.230 Path: chonsp.franklin.ch!pfaff.ethz.ch!news-zh.switch.ch!news-ge.switch.ch!isdnet!newsfeed.tli.de!newsfeed.nacamar.de!ayres.ftech.net!news.ftech.net!newsfeed.wirehub.nl!tank.news.pipex.net!pipex!bore.news.pipex.net!pipex!not-for-mail >NEWSGROUP PERSONALITY >Words: anonymous >To be sung to "Modern Major General" by Gilbert & Sullivan Just discovered that it's written by Tom Holt, who's probably best known for his fantasy novels such as 'Who's Afraid of Beowulf' and 'Expecting Someone Taller'. A jolly good writer: I love his historical novels, including 'The Walled Orchard'. What a good thing that no newsgroup personality like that ever appears in this group, eh? :) Love from Julia. ###### Reply-To: "Trish" From: "Trish" Newsgroups: alt.out-of-body References: <371a3421.42296808@news.dial.pipex.com> <371a49c9.47834896@news.dial.pipex.com> Subject: Re: NEWSGROUP PERSONALITY Lines: 26 X-Newsreader: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.71.1712.3 X-MimeOLE: Produced By Microsoft MimeOLE V4.72.2106.4 Message-ID: <84uS2.3408$_a6.164624@paloalto-snr1> X-Trace: /K+neRD2uFIjB7G9Q34cIrVQq3EWIGsmJ89bjSWhYSF2jtwsqvS6hyeOlBZ6W/LnbAsMA1j5tmie!361GqDtXgMLFe6aRzjBY9HotFtXcP0ea4YOD81ajU5wpf017dfD31Mob9gHUTU2K X-Complaints-To: abuse@gte.net X-Abuse-Info: Please be sure to forward a copy of ALL headers X-Abuse-Info: Otherwise we will be unable to process your complaint properly NNTP-Posting-Date: Sun, 18 Apr 1999 23:40:52 GMT Distribution: world Date: Sun, 18 Apr 1999 23:40:52 GMT Path: chonsp.franklin.ch!pfaff.ethz.ch!news-zh.switch.ch!news-ge.switch.ch!news.maxwell.syr.edu!cpk-news-hub1.bbnplanet.com!washdc3-snh1.gtei.net!news.gtei.net!paloalto-snr1.POSTED!not-for-mail Julia Hawkes-Moore wrote in message <371a49c9.47834896@news.dial.pipex.com>... >>NEWSGROUP PERSONALITY >>Words: anonymous >>To be sung to "Modern Major General" by Gilbert & Sullivan > > Just discovered that it's written by Tom Holt, who's probably best >known for his fantasy novels such as 'Who's Afraid of Beowulf' and >'Expecting Someone Taller'. A jolly good writer: I love his historical >novels, including 'The Walled Orchard'. > > What a good thing that no newsgroup personality like that ever >appears in this group, eh? :) >Love from Julia. Julia ... When I read that I smiled and thought of Earl Curley. I miss the ole coot. Thanks for a good one ..... Trish ###### From: "Bart" Newsgroups: alt.out-of-body Subject: Re: NEWSGROUP PERSONALITY Date: Mon, 19 Apr 1999 02:44:53 -0400 Organization: Netcom Lines: 19 Message-ID: <7fej9l$1pp@dfw-ixnews8.ix.netcom.com> References: <371a3421.42296808@news.dial.pipex.com> <371a49c9.47834896@news.dial.pipex.com> <84uS2.3408$_a6.164624@paloalto-snr1> NNTP-Posting-Host: clv-oh39-50.ix.netcom.com X-NETCOM-Date: Mon Apr 19 1:43:01 AM CDT 1999 X-Newsreader: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.72.3110.1 X-MimeOLE: Produced By Microsoft MimeOLE V4.72.3110.3 Path: chonsp.franklin.ch!pfaff.ethz.ch!news-zh.switch.ch!news-ge.switch.ch!news.maxwell.syr.edu!ix.netcom.com!news Trish wrote in message <84uS2.3408$_a6.164624@paloalto-snr1>... >When I read that I smiled and thought of Earl Curley. I miss the ole >coot. I've seen you comment on missing EC a few times. I guess I have to admit that I sort of miss him too. He was an interesting personality... Wrong most of the time - while forcing others to tell the truth... As I said before - now he knows the truth. Bart ###### Message-ID: <371BDC62.ABEEA95E@the.end.of.the.message> Date: Tue, 20 Apr 1999 11:46:10 +1000 From: Craig Organization: Deja Vous X-Mailer: Mozilla 4.5 [en] (Win98; I) X-Accept-Language: en MIME-Version: 1.0 Newsgroups: alt.out-of-body Subject: Re: NEWSGROUP PERSONALITY References: <371a3421.42296808@news.dial.pipex.com> <371a49c9.47834896@news.dial.pipex.com> Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit NNTP-Posting-Host: 203.18.28.28 X-Trace: 20 Apr 1999 13:19:22 +1000, 203.18.28.28 Lines: 31 Path: chonsp.franklin.ch!pfaff.ethz.ch!news-zh.switch.ch!news-ge.switch.ch!isdnet!newsfeed.cwix.com!129.250.35.146!iad-peer.news.verio.net!news.verio.net!uunet!ffx.uu.net!in4.uu.net!nap-ns1!203.18.28.28 Julia Hawkes-Moore wrote: > > >NEWSGROUP PERSONALITY > >Words: anonymous > >To be sung to "Modern Major General" by Gilbert & Sullivan > > Just discovered that it's written by Tom Holt, who's probably best > known for his fantasy novels such as 'Who's Afraid of Beowulf' and > 'Expecting Someone Taller'. A jolly good writer: I love his historical > novels, including 'The Walled Orchard'. > > What a good thing that no newsgroup personality like that ever > appears in this group, eh? :) Gawd, just love that sarcasm Julia. ;-) I think there is a little of a lot of us in there. :-) LOL, and a lot of the rest! ;-) All the best Craig -- The sure way to make a thing impossible- -is to think it so. --- Franklin To respond, delete _nospam_ scrappy@_nospam_netconnect.com.au --