From: "Bluedog!" Newsgroups: sci.physics,sci.skeptic Subject: The Gravity Crisis Date: Mon, 19 Jan 1998 11:46:25 -0500 Message-ID: <34C38361.66B@hotmail.com> Here's my take on a subject mentioned here recently- From Issue 6 of Twin Capes Review, a cynical look at modern society and culture. Online at http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Gallery/1840/ The Gravity Crisis Is it just me, or is gravity getting stronger every day? I've noticed, over the past several years, that I'm getting a step slower all the time. And I honestly don't weigh much more than I did fifteen years ago. I've quietly asked my friends and acquaintances about it, and they are seeing the same thing happen to them. When we get together to play basketball, nobody can jump more than about 6 inches vertical, and after a half hour, we're all pooped. So it's not just me. It's all over the country. All around the world, for that matter, based on what I see on TV. Remember back in the 1970's when we routinely sent men to the moon, there to flaunt the lack of gravity by skipping and bounding about across the lunar surface? When's the last time you saw someone doing that? Not for a long time. It's because we can't do it anymore, and the Government knows about it. I tell you, it's got me scared and upset. Because if the earth's gravity is getting stronger, then it's capable of pulling the moon closer to us, eventually crashing the two spheres together in a great cataclysm. Have you noticed how on some evenings the moon comes up and seems to be a little bigger than it should be? It gives me a shudder every time I see it. It's coming, I tell you. Don't kid yourself. The Government knows about this problem and is working feverishly trying to solve it. But they're keeping it all very hush-hush, so as not to cause a general panic. They've cooked up this "Year 2000" hoax as a cover to hire a ton of computer programmers and consulting firms to work on the gravity crisis. Let's face it. Anybody with any common sense can see that all the computers in the world are not going to go bonkers just because the computer clock goes from 1999 to 2000. Jeez. That's like saying your car is going to blow up when the odometer hits 100,000 miles. It just rolls over. How stupid do they think the public actually is? No, it's gravity, all right, and I hope they can get it fixed. Cause if not, we're all going to die screaming in our beds one day, unable to get up, withs tons of moon rocks crashing down around us. I tell ya, it'll make Pompeii look look like a ticker-tape parade. Remember, you heard it here first. Bluedog ###### From: wanglese@ozemail.com.au (Wally Anglesea) Newsgroups: sci.physics,sci.skeptic Subject: Re: The Gravity Crisis Date: Tue, 20 Jan 1998 08:49:32 GMT Message-ID: <34ca61bd.2977466@news.ozemail.com.au> On Mon, 19 Jan 1998 11:46:25 -0500, "Bluedog!" wrote: Oh I dunno, I seem to be noticing that the scales are wrong, as they are reporting a greater mass for me than they should. Not only that, I believe that I have evidence that the universe is expanding, because my waist size has increased. In fact I think it may be related to the Hubble Constant. However, I do note that I'm more light headed, and therefore I think this is further evidence, because my head id further away from the centre of the Earths gravity than it was 10 years ago. Find out about Australia's most dangerous Doomsday Cult: http://www.ozemail.com.au/~wanglese/pebble.htm "needs sugar...." -Socrates ###### From: Steve Terrell Newsgroups: sci.physics,sci.skeptic Subject: The Speed of Light Crisis, Was: The Gravity Crisis Date: Tue, 20 Jan 1998 09:42:25 -0600 Message-ID: <34C4C5E1.8BA6F659@hfab1.sc.ti.com> Wally Anglesea wrote: .... Well, if gravity isn't increasing, but mass is increasing, then we must have a speed close to that of the speed of light. This, of course, is not very feasible. So, I conclude that the speed of light is decreasing. Ever since I can remember, the speed of light has been fluctuating at 1/2 year (that's earth years, not light years) intervals. On one day in the spring, the light from the morning sun will arrive exactly 1 hour late. On one day in the fall, the light from the morning sun will arrive exactly 1 hour early. I know because I check the clock on my computer. Not to worry, though, the American government has a project to store up some of the light in case the speed of light gets too slow to support us. The widely publicised project's slogan is: "It's daylight savings time!". Also, the light from traffic lights have been reaching the drivers' eyes more slowly. Many drivers claim that the light was green or yellow when other drivers who where closer claim that the light had already turned to yellow or red. So remember to put your solar powered calculators in a dark place when you're not using them in order to preserve sunlight. Chow, Steve