If I Only Had A Dong

by Liz Zitzow (lizzit)

Tune from Wizard of Oz

I've been feeling kind of jealous,
Of all them cocky fellas,
Like Michael, Rod, and Mick.
Doctor can you mend me?
I've a case of penis envy,
If I only had a dick.

It would have to be a big one,
A giant horny love gun,
To make me be a jock.
Girls would never beg my pardon,
They would turn on to my hardon
If I only had a cock.

Oh, I can tell you now,
the number of times I'd score,
I could fuck girls like I never have before,
and then I'd cum (wee!)
And fuck some more!

I would not be just a housewife,
Living a little mouselife
In days that drag out long....
I would dance and be merry
Life would be a ding-a-derry
If I only had a dong!


If I Only Had A Clit

by Liz Zitzow (lizzit)

Tune from Wizard of Oz

I am tired of being macho,
I'd rather be a nacho
A tasty little fit...
I think it's rather rude
That my genitals protrude,
If I only had a clit!

(I forgot this verse)

Oh, I can tell you why
A man's life is too tough
I would rather be a gorgeous sexy muff,
Because I don't
Cum enough!

I am tired of being HeMan
Bloated up with semen
A one-orgasm tough
I would dance and be merry
Life would be a ding-a-derry
If I only had a muff!


(No offense is intended by the previous songs to either sex or orientation)